Hard to believe I read this book years ago. I certainly learned nothing from it at the time though I suppose I found it an inspiring idea and I'm sure it must have deepened my feeling for God.. If I'd assumed the Pursuit of God had to be a lifelong protracted spiritual growth, as the Christian life in general is iusually taught in the churches, Tozer disabuses me of that idea in his third chapter.
No careless or casual dealings will suffice. Let [the born-again believer] come to God in full determination to be heard. Let him insist that God accept his all, that He take things out of his heart and Himself reign there in power. It may be he will need to become specific, to name things and people by their names one by one. If he will become drastic enough he can shorten the time of his travail from years to minutes and enter the good land long before his slower brethren who coddle their feelings and insist upon caution in their dealings with God.
Let us never forget that such a truth as this can not be learned by rote as one would learn the facts of physical science. They must be experienced before we can really know them. \We must in our hearts live through Abraham’s harsh and bitter experiences if we would know the blessedness which follows them. The ancient curse will not go out painlessly; the tough old miser within us will not lie down and die obedient to our command. He must be torn out of our heart like a plant from the soil; he must be extracted in agony and blood like a tooth from the jaw. He must be expelled from our soul by violence as Christ expelled the money changers from the temple.
And we shall need to steel ourselves against his piteous begging, and to recognize it as springing out of self-pity, one of the most reprehensible sins of the human heart. If we would indeed know God in growing intimacy we must go this way of renunciation. And if we are set upon the pursuit of God He will sooner or later bring us to this test.
Father, I want to know Thee, but my coward heart fears to give up its toys. I cannot part with them without inward bleeding, and I do not try to hide from Thee the terror of the parting. I come trembling, but I do come. Please root from my heart all those things which I have cherished so long and which have become a very part of my living self, so that Thou mayest enter and dwell there without a rival. Then shalt Thou make the place of Thy feet glorious. Then shall my heart have no need of the sun to shine in it, for Thyself wilt be the light of it, and there shall be no night there. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
There is no doubt this is terrifying. I think of what Madame Guyon suffered for her love of God. But all I have to do is ponder my own attachments and sins and bad habits and the prospect of God's taking them away precipitously and it is terrifying. And yet this is what i want. I'm too old to spend any more time being easy on myself, though from what Tozer says this abrupt method may be what everybody should be doing anyway. I pray also that He will give me the strength to bear it, give me the strength not to refuse whatever He would take from me or put me through. I review in my mind all the various possibilities that occur to me but He knows me better than I know myself and I may miss what He sees to be the most important barriers to the spiritual life in Him that I want. Things in my life, people in my life, what people think of me, health, etc. These are just some of the categories in which the necessary stripping could be done. Give me the strength to say "Thy will be done Lord." You are worth it though in the midst of pain it could only too easily be forgotten and I've forgotten it for years already.
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